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Finding Lasting Love

Have you ever stopped to wonder why divorce rates are so high and why the reason often given for a failed marriage is irreconcilable differences? It is a sad fact, but perhaps one of the biggest reasons why couples break up is that they do not really know what they want in the relationship. Or it could be that they think they know and only realize too late that they have been aiming for the wrong things when they enter the marriage.

You see, there is more to marriage than love. As an often-quoted passage goes, marriage is a meeting of the minds. Love is only part of the equation. If the couple do not understand one another and do not have the same fundamental beliefs, the marriage may have an increased chance at failing.

It takes more than love to make any meaningful relationship work. For one, you and your partner hopefully share similar fundamental beliefs, as mentioned above. You two are on the same page when it comes to major life issues like sex, religion, handling money, having children, raising them and other such critical issues. If you cannot be on the exact same page about them, you at least have to make allowances and compromises for your differences and live through them.

One major fallacy that we may have is that an individual cannot be a complete person on his or her own and the soulmate is the only path to completeness. Nothing else is more false than this.

We can be happy and complete on our own, so we should not expect our partners to be the magic potion that make us happy or whole. There is a reason why spouses are called partners; they are meant to complement us, not to complete us. A world of difference lies between complementing and completing.

If you are currently dating your dream guy or girl and are considering marriage, always remember that you should define first what would matter most to you in your life. Only then can you be happy in a shared life of marital bliss.

Posted at 9:29 PM on Sep 6, 2009 By

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